Born in Saint Michael and raised in Bridgetown, Barbados, Rihanna was discovered by American record producer Evan Rogers who invited her to the United States to record demo tapes. Note: The article is a work of satire and meant to be taken in jest.Robyn Rihanna Fenty (born February 20, 1988) ( / r i ˈ æ n ə/ ree- AN-ə) is a Barbadian singer, actress, fashion designer, and businesswoman. When it was pointed out that their supporters on social media were not happy and extremely displeased, one leader sent us a meme of Nana Patekar that said, “Seh Lenge Thoda”.
They were happy that they would no longer have to keep a watch for tractors behind their back now that the matter had been resolved.
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But they gave us the impression that a few free passes for the popstar’s next concern could resolve the matter.īut overall, a general sense of contentment appeared to pervade the inner circles of the government. Some other leaders said that they would not permit Rihanna to shoot the video of the song in Punjab. When we reached out to the Government for a comment on the matter, they said they that condemn it in the harshest terms ( kadi ninda). Their situation is further complicated by the fact that Tikait has even decided a name for the name.
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His comrades, on the other hand, are not quite sure how to break it to him that Mia Khalifa does not exactly feature in ‘conventional’ movies.
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In fact, Rakesh Tikait is so convinced that he will master the lyrics quickly that he has made up his mind to request a movie with Mia Khalifa next, having been told that Mia Khalifa is one of the most popular actresses in the world.
Tikait, meanwhile, is extremely excited about the recent turn of events and taken to address himself and Rihanna as ‘Rikait’ within a very short span of time. Yogendra Yadav has always fancied himself as a poet and it was due to a cruel twist of fate that he ended up being a henchman for Lutyens Delhi. In the farmer redux edition, Rihanna will portray the role of a left-leaning Delhi woman struggling to breathe due to the pollution caused by stubble burning. However, his request that the lyrics of the song be altered to fit the ‘farmer’ theme has been accepted by the popstar’s agents. The first was intended to mock the Indian Government while the latter was meant as an ode to his fellow protesters. The other songs that Tikait proposed were ‘Moo kaala muqabla hoga’ and ‘Tum jaise ch*tiyo ka sahara hai dosto’. While he expressed a desire to record the song ‘ Ishq tera tar paaye‘ with Rihanna, believing it would appeal to the Punjabi constituents of the protests, he settled for ‘Love the way you lie’ after hearing Rihanna’s attempt at speaking Hindi. We are told that Rakesh Tikait was jubilated by the news and has suddenly fallen in love with life all over again. It is now believed that Rihanna has consented to record a ‘farmer redux’ edition of her hit song ‘Love the way you lie’ with Rakesh Tikait featuring alongside her instead of Eminem. Heartbroken at witnessing Tikait’s visible decline, some of his trusted lieutenants contacted popstar Rihanna who had given great support to the protests through her social media accounts. His close confidantes believed his comments on Friday were the “dying embers of the brightest star in the firmament of Indian history.”
According to Reliable Sources, the protest leader was upset because he has lost the very object that lent meaning to his existence.Īfter Narendra Modi made the announcement, Tikait had declared that the protests would continue but he was not confident whether he will be able to convince others to stay now that the farm laws are set to be repealed. The protest leader has reserved all the dates in his calendar till May 2024 for protests but the sudden vacuum created by the announcement has left him jobless.Īccording to people on the ground, Rakesh Tikait could be spotted sitting quietly in the corner, with droplets of tears in his eyes, visibly depressed while others burst crackers to celebrate the occasion. While it was welcome news for the protesters, it was not so much for Tikait himself. Our friendly neighbourhood farmer Rakesh Tikait is suffering an existential crisis after Prime Minister Narendra Modi announced that the farm laws will be repealed by the government.